I came across a concept a few days ago as I was reading a book, “we all need goals in life”. As I look at the concept, I noticed that I don’t have much reference to that. And as I asked myself what my goals are, there were no image that came up. I am not too sure what goals are to me, let alone my goals.
To many people, I may sound like a failure, a lost soul, or someone without an aim in life. And I totally agree with how I could look that way… and the strange thing is I am ok with that.
And I could remembered the time when I used to have goals, especially goals that I want myself to have, goals that I think will be good for me, goals that I think will make me happier. And I get to see that those are “standards” that I have taken on as my goals without checking in with myself, Really. And the result is a lot of stress, denial and self-blame.
So, what is my goal to me now? I do what comes up for me to do. Let me see, I get up, I get to do the things I have planned and scheduled to do. And when it comes to me to work on a project, I listen to it and stay open and see if it can be done and then work towards that OR don’t work towards it. And it doesn’t mean it will not happen the next minute, day, or week. I just can’t know.
However, I don’t force myself to do it like I used to, no more abuse from the inside. Here is a mind that knows it can’t be controlled. Frustrating, yes, it can be in the beginning. And the mind that is more open looks for reasons why it is a good thing that it is not getting what it wants. And it ain’t an easy job. It’s real research work!!! And when it finds those reasons, it rests in the balance, I love it that I have it and I also love it that I don’t have it. And in that space, the clear mind arise and it rests in the experience of what it thought will bring it by having a goal and out of that fluid actions happen.
And that may look like a woman just sitting down in front of a T.V.
Isn’t that interesting?