If The Universe Is Friendly…

A dear friend asked if I can do a free class for our dear friends. I asked her for a topic and she said, “Katie always says, “The Universe is Friendly”, if this is true, how can COVID-19 pandemic be good for us?

I pondered for a while and my mind went to a time when a friend in Singapore who attended my workshop three years ago, told me during a dinner gathering, “Sue, you know, when I question the statement — “my dog shouldn’t die” in your workshop, when we came to the turnaround — my dog should die, I was really upset and couldn’t even face it. Now, three years later, I could see how his death was a gift for me.

Wow, really? Tell me more about it!” I asked.

After his death, I felt so sad and miserable and I started to seek for deeper meaning of life and did some healing work. Then I started to come out and meet my old friends and made new friends. I feel happier now than before. ” she said.

When we are going through hardship in our lives, it is very hard for the mind to think beyond its circumstances in the moment. At some level, we are resisting to even consider the possibility of how this pandemic is a good thing for us.

It takes quite some willingness and stillness to contemplate a big topic like this. And sometimes the gifts come many years later.

How could this pandemic or the motion control order (MCO) happening now in Malaysia a good thing for me? This question requires me to get still, looking at before the MCO, and now. What is happening within me, me with my family, my work and my financial standing.

The mind would rush to look for all proofs, flood our minds with images of businesses that are closed, reports in the media about the amount of people who lost their jobs, the thinning of our bank accounts, the rise of domestic violence cases reported in the news….

Take some time, go in and find what is true for you, not for the purpose of proving someone right or wrong, but simply for the love of truth because only that can take us deeper into ourselves and allow us the experience of peace and goodness that is always there, waiting to be discovered.

Enjoy the trip. 🙂

Ultimate Destination

I want to talk about ultimate destination today. I used to really want to get done with this life, to figure life out, to reach an ultimate final destination, and to me that was played out as a desire to be enlightened in this lifetime. And I was a very dedicated Mahayana Buddhist practitioner.

I tried to do everything I learned to be the right thing to do, the right way to be and the more I wanted it, the more I tried, the worst I became; I was less happy than I was before, I found myself talked down to myself, my self-judgement grew stronger. And I found myself falling into a pithole that I didn’t know how to get out.

I am sure you want to know how I got out from that pithole. Basically I have to go against what I believed to be true. I have to put myself before all the beliefs I held so dear. I questioned them one by one. I realized that any good belief is not worth me holding so dear if it was really true. I don’t have to be afraid of losing it, I question them and I am free from it.

So, do I still believe all these good beliefs and teaching? Of course I do. They are equal as all other beliefs I have, not higher or lower. I realized for myself that when I hold them as ultimate or best belief, the “I” would want me to live it, and unconsciously, I would measure myself or people around me to that standard and that is the big cause of stress in my life.

And the funny thing about an ultimate destination is it is imagined. To know it in the mind and in the heart is totally two different experience. One is buying in to another person’s experience and the other is through your very own direct experience. And once you know it for yourself that there is no where to go except in this moment, many dreams start to shatter away. It is a raw naked experience. Not fun to be in but a really sweet place to be. Because it is a place where you are moving closer to your heart, your dearest self.


Finally got a dear friend to fix the wordpress error for me and I could write again.

I want to talk about our divinity as human. Many years ago, I was told by someone that the word “Namaste” means the divine in me salutes to the divine in you. When I heard that explanation, it was like a nectar to my soul. I thought to myself, what a beautiful expression that was.

And it always stuck me how that would look like living out in this physical world. In order to salute your divinity, I would have to acknowledge my own divinity. And I come to see that in this world that we live in, the systems we have running shun that off from us. If we look at religion, say, the Christianity, in order to be one, you have to accept the basic belief that you are a sinner. “Forgive me Father for I have sinned”. How can a sinner ever acknowledge its’ divinity? Especially when I have to constantly be conscious of my wrong doings in order to repent?

I am not saying that repent or confession doesn’t work, but if I think there is really something outside that is watching me and judging me other than my own conscience at work, I would be living in a lot of fear.

And it would take another level of responsibility to move beyond an almighty entity to living out my life relying on my own conscience. One would have to be conscious of all levels of hideouts that the ego does. And really come to terms with all levels of self-responsibility. One would have to be very vigilant and yet gentle as gentleness is the door to our hearts.